An Elegy For “M”
A scarf the color of wild berries and roses drapes across your graceful neck…..
Your silk pantsuit gently embraces your curves…..
Your hair is impeccable, not one strand is out of place…..
Your elegant poise, one of strength and courage and endearment…..
Is a breath of life in a room so suffocated with grief, so overflowing with sorrow and mourning…..
But all these mourners do share one thing in common…..
They have come to say their good-byes…..
Good-bye to a woman some called a friend, a sister, a mother, a wife…..
Good-bye to a woman who elevated and inspired so many people…..
They have come to say good-bye to you…..
Written by Marisa Miller
This is definitely a touching poem. I liked that it caought the mournful ness but also described how she was. I know we are suppose to be giving constructive vriticism but I really think you hit all of the key points with literary devices and everything. Good job!
ReplyDeleteYour poem is GREAT! You painted a wonderful picture for the reader of the setting and also this wonderful lady. You are able to capture the sad side of loosing someone we love but also keep her memory alive by sharing your relationship with her. I loved the part when you described the room as suffocating with grief... good choice of words to create a powerful message to your reader.
ReplyDeleteWow. I could definitely FEEL this poem I wish I was this good at this.
ReplyDeleteI love your rhetoric that you used.
I'm just trying to criticize you on something.. but I can't think of anything at the moment other than possibly using a few different, more descriptive words in a couple places.
I'll get back to you on that one.
Good job.